Day 1: Defeated? Nah.

10/07/22

On this day, it was about 7:30AM when my alarm clock went off with the intention of being on the road by 10AM latest. My first stop on my maiden voyage was 6 hrs away in Ashland, VA to visit my sister for about a week and I wanted to try to get there in time for dinner.

After making my coffee and packing the van with the last few things from my room- I said my last goodbyes;

to the bedroom that made this apartment a home and was the green house for more than 100 plants, 2 fish, and 2 domestic mice.

to the kitchen that a many family meals were cooked.

to the common area where many late night conversations were had.

to the roof deck that hosted many birthday lasagna dinners.

and to my downstairs neighbor, post morning run, who I bumped into as I walked out the doors of 170 Smith Street for the last time as a tenant.

It was a very bittersweet time, but one that was inevitable.

Setting my destination on my Waze, I took a deep breath and began my dive out of Brooklyn. I turned South on the BQE towards Staten Island- it’s the route I always took when I’d drive south, specially to my sister’s house. This drive was different, unlike before I didn’t have any intentions on driving back, so I made sure to take it all in.

I was about 1 hour away from Ashland, encountering stop and go traffic for the previous hour, I was almost free from the congestion. The cars in front of me began to speed up allowing more space between them and the car behind them. As I pressed excitedly but kindly on the gas, my engine begin to rev, but not in a good way. It was in a way where my RPMS would shoot up but my speed did not.
I felt my hands begin to tingle. I knew this situation, as it was a problem I had encountered before. One that I thought was resolved. 

Apparently it wasn’t. 

I turned on my hazard lights.
Nervously and cautiously I made my way across the highway to the next exit. I couldn’t go more than 35 MPH without the RPMs hitting 4500 or more because the van wasn’t shifting into the next gear. With my sister on the speaker phone I let her know what was going on with the van and drove around on the access road to make sure I wasn’t making things up and it turns out I wasn’t.
Annoyed,
Stressed,
And a little defeated,
I pulled into the gas station right off the highway and parked in the far right hand of the parking lot, enough room to get onto a tow truck. 

After eating cold left over pizza I brought with me from the night before and drinking a cold beer from my fridge (also from the night before), I called my sister back to let her know my current situation while trying to hold back my tears of frustration.
She was trying to figure out how to get me to Ashland.
I began my search for a shop that could get my van in. I decided the easiest way to get my van checked out would be to take it straight into a dealership mostly because not all mechanics have space to work on a cargo van like mine and at that point I was already frustrated with the situation that was supposed to be fix. It had been 3 or 4 shop visits and about $3k worth of “fixing” already. Not sure if the previous shop didn't actually know what was wrong or they just keep wanting to take my money. 

After calling a few different shops, the consencous was the earliest any of their mechanics could look at the van would be in a couple weeks and that was just to look at it, it wasn’t even to fix it. 

The feeling of defeat was building.
First day on the road and I’ve already hit a massive roadblock that would set my course off a couple weeks. 

I was trying to get to Texas by Thanksgiving and had plans on making quite a few stops on the way to check out some of the East’s finest climbing areas. 
The New
The Red
Obed
Chatty 
I wanted to stop and see my brother in Dallas and my friend in Austin before I got to Corpus, so my itinerary was pretty set. It’s okay, I had accounted for some buffer time and I could easily link two drives together for one full day of driving. Rearranging travel plans was something I was accustomed to.

The set back still hit with some disappointed.

There was one more dealership I could call, it was the Stafford Chrysler Dodge Jeep Ram and Fiat of Fredericksburg, about an hour and a half north of Ashland.

Honestly the only reason I typed out Stafford Chrysler Dodge Jeep Ram and Fiat of Fredericksburg (I copied and pasted this time) was because they are saints and they said they could look at the van on Monday. 
It was a Friday. 
Done. 
Hooray!
I called AAA to let them know I needed a tow and where to drop off my van, then I called my sister to let her know the update. While I was shop searching, she was making arrangements to get me to her. Coincidently, her boyfriend was near where I was at and the idea was that they would come pick me up, but it had not been confirmed.

I should preface that I had not met him before, so when an older man approached my van and stood In the doorway while I was on the phone with AAA, my guard went straight up and I was ready to use my first taser prongs on him.
After I asked if I could help him as he lingered towards the back of my van while I was talking to the shop employee, he responds with “I’m John, Christine’s friend”.
Bro, you could have lead with that rather than peaking into my van and giving me a thumbs up while I was on the phone.

Long story short, they actually looked at my van the next day! About 2 weeks and $2100 later I was finally on the road headed to my next destination. It had turned out that my engine wiring harness was a MESS. We’re talking ripped, cut, and jankily taped wiring. It was so array that some connections weren’t staying connected and one of those connections was my speed sensor, which is why when the gas was pressed, the RPMs would increase but my speed did not. I haven't had that same problem since.

During that time, I went through a rollercoaster of feelings of hopelessness, disappointment, and defeat, but I realized that this was probably a sign from the universe telling me to slow down. I was also very fortunate that this had happened an hour out from where my sister lived and that I was with my sister during all of this.

I had a place to stay along with never-ending support and because I was leaving the East Coast, the extra time I got to spend with her was necessary. During my time on the East Coast, we had grown closer and had the opportunity to spend more time together- so it was comforting to have that time with her.

This was yet another lesson I had to learn in embracing the present and finding appreciation in where I was at rather than focusing on what could have been. It’s a lesson I’m constantly working on remembering when things don’t go as planned.


But what is a plan anyway, other than an optimistic blueprint.